Reconstruction
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.
This stage was really hard for me. I didn't want to do anything without first asking Thomas. So what was I suppose to do? I had to figure it out on my own. After living 48 years with Thomas, I learned a few things from him. But the one thing I'm having trouble with is how to save money. Thomas could squirrel away money, but I just want to spend, spend, spend. I have to learn not to spend so much money on "stuff". But I don't have Thomas to ask for advice, so I'm learning on my own. A few years before Thomas passed, he bought a new riding mower, our old just wore out. He was so proud of that mower.
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